Snow White

Mirror, mirror on the wall,
Who is the fairest of them all?
White threads - smooth, intricate bound,
Their warm embrace by black strands crowned;
Dark, deep waters - silky, smooth,
Entering in to quieten and soothe;
Capsules - small, shaped like a kite,
Silent thieves of breathe by night; or
Cliffs - majestic, towering, strong;
Freefalling the path along...
Tell me, mirror on the wall,
Which would you choose of them all?!

Ten Little Indians



View from a lonely graveyard on a hill near the sea.








First there were ten
Now there are three
Everyone's gone
'cept two and me
















I have a room to clean and hair to wash, but since it has been so very long since I have felt the urge to blog, it seemed only right to give in to it. Two years have flown by, and I cannot help but think of the beginning when ten little Indians (not quite accurate, but following from the nursery rhyme) arrived in Big City, to experience a new way of life and see where it took us. And I remember, even further back in time, when five of the ten, during a whiz trip to Big City, after a long and ravenous search for a restaurant with a decent vegetarian menu and being forced to give away chocolate to a passing waif, settled for a Lebanese joint in Ca**ing Town, and laughed at how we would come back here, years in the future and fight to pay the bill. Back then, three units of Big City money, translated to such a large number of rupees it seemed such a waste to eat it all in one meal (at least it did to me)!

Time marched on, and some of the ten grew fatter and ponchier (I did) and some absorbed Big City style and panache (I'd like to think I did); we travelled, we danced, we took tons of photographs, we developed the dark circles and insomnia that the Wharf invariably brings, we lived in our little flats, mostly as satellites around the Wharf, and swapped awful landlord stories (Pijeon, not my present landlords of course, I mean my previous one) and made the best use of our time in Big City. We never went back to Ca**ing Town for dinner, but, well, by then we had found better places to dine at (and who has their first Big City dinner there anyway, right?).

And now the two years are over. The mass exodus from Big City began last month (well, actually it began six months ago with the first little Indian who answered the call of Lit). Most of the little Indians are moving on to new and exciting experiences always craved, or going in search of new and exciting experiences to crave.

I knew some of you better than others, but all of you hold a place in my memory and I will miss your faces around the Wharf. So thank you - for the fun, the food, a listening ear, a hug when needed, tips about departments and supervisors, being my travelmate, taking an awesome fb profile picture, keeping a transcript of the Cluedo game, being my partner getting through exams, being an awesome flatmate, being a hospitable neighbour, helping me figure out Rita Ora lyrics ("Let's party and whaaaat?"), being an oasis of home abroad and just generally, being around and making the transition to Big City life a lot easier! Good luck with Lit, Marriage, Entrepreneurship, Policy, Singland and/or the Great Unknown and I hope our paths cross again in the future!

Just a thought.

Living by the river. Dreaming of the wide sea. 

My heart's always drifting. Better lives there must be.

Mr. M.N. Holla

My first memories are of living at my grandpa's house. I remember he was always the first to get up in the morning making tea and chapatis, I remember walking with him some afternoons to Rajanna's milk farm across the parallel road to get fresh cow's milk for tea, playing "who talks last" in the passenger's seat while he drove his old blue left-hand drive around, and listening wide-eyed to his anecdotes about his childhood in the village at Mangalore and of the Arabs and Europeans he worked with in Kuwait. I remember him helping me learn Kannada for school exams, praying at all our family lunches and most recently celebrating my birthday with me along with my Grandma and Aunty Joyce. He was a very friendly and generous man, always giving others and helping everybody he could. He would smile even at strangers and the number of people in just our neighbourhood who knew Mr. Holla and considered him a friend outnumbers my list of so-called "friends" from across the world on facebook. I can vouch for the fact that he made the best chicken biryani, and while I used to grumble about eating his chicken curry as a child, I now miss it and can't imagine growing up without it. 

I remember him always coming for every school event, be it sports day, my prize distribution days, my graduation, always reminding us that he built the Flack auditorium at school and always being so very proud to say he was our grandfather. And today, I am proud to say that I am his granddaughter. Proverbs 13:22 says that a good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children and I believe that my life is so blessed because of the way grandpa lived. He left an inheritance of the richest blessings for Rachel and I and for Joshua, Jonathan, David, Lia and Gil. There were many hardships he faced and sacrifices he made looking after my grandmom and his six children and he took a difficult stand when he chose to follow Christ as a young man, but God was a father to him and took care of all his needs, gave him a long life, good health for most of it, and provided for every member of this family. God used him to reach others as well, be it through his work with the Gideon Ministry, the Brethren church in Kuwait which first started in my grandma and his home, his work on the board at Elim in Whitefield and the numbers of people he gave lifts to in his car.  It amazes me how the choices made by one man to serve God have had such a cascading effect not just on his own family but also on so many others.

A passage which had a profound effect on his life and led him to God as a young man is found in both Mark 8:36 and Matthew 16:26 - "For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?" I am sad that he is no longer with us and wish I could be there at his funeral, but it is a great encouragement to know that even if my grandpa is no longer in this world his soul is safe with Jesus and I will meet him again someday.

Is there a holiday in sight?

The first exam hurdle has been attempted, and now I'm keeping my fingers crossed and my prayers flowing that it has actually been crossed. I'm tired now though. There's been a headache on since last Wednesday which isn't going and I have to admit I'm quite annoyed with it! Maybe I should get my eyes checked...hmmm...possibility.

It's good to be back to the real world, and the best feeling in a week and a half was walking home the night after the exam, and seeing the night sky and the boats and feeling the cold night breeze. It's good to be alive.

I still feel like I'm on autopilot though. My brain got fried sometime over the last week and there's a robot going through the motions now.

I can't wait to get away. A holiday is definitely the way to go!

Thank you to all those who prayed for my study and the exam, and those who messaged in providing a human lifeline, and to NWD, MNP, and RAP2 for bearing with all my stressed out shenanigans.

Have a good week all. ;-)

"Down the only road I've ever been down"

I haven't blogged in a long time. I think that's partly because the angsty college bit of me disappeared since the end of university....no matter what people say about college being the best years of your life, I think I like the grown-up world a whole lot better! Or maybe it's just London. :o)

On the whole, despite the rain, I've been happy. I think a lot of this has to do with my church community (at the barge - check it out here - http://www.stpetersbarge.org/ ).  It's been encouraging to see the level of support people give to one another, in practical matters (could I borrow a single fork for my dinner party please?), emotional ones (so and so and I aren't talking, I'm not handling this well, what do I do??) and of course spiritual (how's your quiet time going?). And the warmth extended to newcomers (like me, ten months ago). Despite the diversity reflected in church, I've never had so many like-minded friends all at one go, and this has been such a strong reminder that no matter where we are and what our background/age/race/nationality, there is one person uniting all of us in a more powerful way than I ever imagined before. I'm so glad to be part of this family.

I love my work. I seriously sincerely do. And I like seeing how I've grown over the last 10 months...my confidence, my skills. It's great to be able to wake up in the morning (most days...sometimes that's when I'm going to bed) and know that I have the rest of the day to do something I actually enjoy!

At the moment, though, I'm very very tired. Working all day and studying most of the night is beginning to tell. Fingers crossed this exam gets done in the first attempt. I don't think I could stand to study this mountain of paper yet again!!!

I live in the hope of an exam-free tomorrow (read post-September into that....there are two more to go once this is done)! Until then, shalom, and as my granddad says, smile those clouds away! ;-)

(I had pictures to add, but blogspot/the internet/my computer) isn't letting me upload at the moment

Almost two months in.

I can't believe it will soon be two months!

Where has the time gone?!

I live for the weekends. That's when this city comes alive to me....music and theatre and church and friends and sleeping in late and adequately long phone conversations and long walks and the city and fresh cold air and rest.

Music is stirring within me again. It can't be missed. Everywhere in this city it calls to me and envelops my soul. Fulfillment I haven't found in a long while. And I'm playing the piano again. Schubert and Chopin flow through my fingers. Impressionistic and romantic. Where have they been all these years? How could I ever have let them go?

And God is very real again. With guardian angels stationed at every tube stop, at every unfamiliar crossroad, and in some old known faces.

So here are some pics from a lovely lovely day. Pics courtesy Annie, who is a wonderful photographer and even caught the sea gulls.

Hugs to everybody back home.